Silenced - Who Is Worse than the Abuser?
Being an abuser of a child is a horrible thing to have done.
The victims struggle lifelong to understand what took place and why... to somehow manage to live on another day.
However to the victims one person can be more harmful to their stability.
And this person is the fellow-victimed that simply cannot be silenced.
SILENCE is what is desperately needed for the victims to remain unknown, to be enabled to have a appealingly normal life, and to embrace the present moment as fully as possible.
The overwhelming majority of people go to their grave keeping silence. Therefore, the overwhelming majority of abusers go to their grave unknown as the abuser they are and unpunished by society.
Of course, one of the main reasons a victim stays silent is a fool-hearted attempt to forget and move beyond without facing the reality of the abuse. The other reason is the victims does not want anyone to know; they are ashamed that they came from a horrid childhood and don’t want to be associated with child abuse in their present life. They want to be able to move among those in society that they believe have never been touched by abuse, and don’t want to be shunned as a potential cycle abuser.
The reason I have been given is for the sake of the children. We protect the new generation of children by silencing the previous generation of children. We let the new generation of children think grandma and grandpa are wholesome, loving people who would never do them any harm. We don’t want them to have to carry the stigmatism of child abuse.
Is it any wonder the cycle of child abuse continues generation after generation?
Perpetrators are protected and treated as who they are not. Fellow victims are forced to play pretend roles of who they are not.
And damn the abused one that speaks out and says the truth about their own childhood. This dear soul is ostracized, cursed, rejected, and removed from any possible relationship that may upset the carefully protected “normal family” facade.
Where is this victims vindication? Who will protect this one?
Certainly, not something so void of substance as a #metoo twitter campaign.
The victims struggle lifelong to understand what took place and why... to somehow manage to live on another day.
However to the victims one person can be more harmful to their stability.
And this person is the fellow-victimed that simply cannot be silenced.
SILENCE is what is desperately needed for the victims to remain unknown, to be enabled to have a appealingly normal life, and to embrace the present moment as fully as possible.
The overwhelming majority of people go to their grave keeping silence. Therefore, the overwhelming majority of abusers go to their grave unknown as the abuser they are and unpunished by society.
Of course, one of the main reasons a victim stays silent is a fool-hearted attempt to forget and move beyond without facing the reality of the abuse. The other reason is the victims does not want anyone to know; they are ashamed that they came from a horrid childhood and don’t want to be associated with child abuse in their present life. They want to be able to move among those in society that they believe have never been touched by abuse, and don’t want to be shunned as a potential cycle abuser.
The reason I have been given is for the sake of the children. We protect the new generation of children by silencing the previous generation of children. We let the new generation of children think grandma and grandpa are wholesome, loving people who would never do them any harm. We don’t want them to have to carry the stigmatism of child abuse.
Is it any wonder the cycle of child abuse continues generation after generation?
Perpetrators are protected and treated as who they are not. Fellow victims are forced to play pretend roles of who they are not.
And damn the abused one that speaks out and says the truth about their own childhood. This dear soul is ostracized, cursed, rejected, and removed from any possible relationship that may upset the carefully protected “normal family” facade.
Where is this victims vindication? Who will protect this one?
Certainly, not something so void of substance as a #metoo twitter campaign.
Comments
I hope you find a way to be real in your life. I needed therapy because it was a place that a person allowed me to tell it like it is, and like it was. I was able to look at what it did to me and then make decisions how to change its damage and to keep from harming others because I was abused.