Journal Entry - 3-27-2003 Prayer Walk

I call it a prayer walk and the first thing I do is sit and look - I am a funny girl.

Father, thank you for blessing me with this beautiful property. Thank you for every tree, rock and flower that adds beauty and warms my soul.

Thank you for the wind blowing across my face, thank you for the trickling sound of water from the fountain, thank you for the warmth from the sun.

Thank you, Father, thank you for caring and being my God.
You take such care in the little things in life. A flower that grows wild and that could go unnoticed holds such detail, care and beauty. You are a God of details. You are a God of care. You admire and make beauty. I am your workmanship. I am beautiful. You invested care and detail into me. You care!

Out of a rock can grow weeds. When we grow hard and cold sin and still grow in the infertile soil. Moss can attach itself to our stony, cold, hard self. Oh, God soften me up. Make me a comfortable place for people to rest near like a beanbag instead of a rocky ledge.

Make me pliable in your hands. Able for you to shape and mold into a priceless treasure of you liking. Help me to be the daughter you long for me to be. Help me to see the light and to understand you more deeply. Remove the blinders of sin from my eyes. Help me to stop focusing in on myself and to start focusing on others.

The peach tree has made it. It has blossoms this year. One of five trees to survive. We have not yet pruned it. I goes any which way it wants, but it goes. Scripture teaches if it is pruned it will bear much fruit. Lord, am I being pruned? Are you cutting me back for this time, teaching me how to slow down, teaching me how to take the time to do the important parts of our Christian walk - the basics...time with You in communication, Bible reading, training up my children to know and love you, being real day in and day out. The Basics! We so much want to do, we so much want to become .... that the basics can be pushed aside. Help me to concentrate on loving and knowing you...the #1 Basic!

Cleaning 18 years of hurt is not going to happen over night. Its a progressive process with You, God, at the helm, but without You it is a waste of time.

Oh, God, forgive me for wasting time, for not including You in the process as I had leaned on You so in the beginning. I dedicate myself now to having process time with You... to share what You are doing in my heart and in each counseling session. I was so busy with Community Bible Study that I didn't have time. Now I will have time again to be with You, to talk, to listen.

A flower bed needs regular maintenance so does my soul. I need to come to You Lord and have You nip away the dead flowers, pull up the fresh weeds, inspect for any insects. You are the gardener of my soul. You lovingly tend to me if I stay put in Your presence.

Oh, Father God, I open my soul to you --- have your way with me!